Trainings, conferences, a networking happy hour, and more. I am constantly finding myself in awkward events, not knowing anyone, but knowing that everyone is doing work that is relevant to me. I’m talking about events where you don’t recognize anyone, you have no wing woman, and you’re desperate to stop dodging eye contact. 

While you’re stuck in your head thinking about how awkward this is, remember that there are a ton of other wallflowers also yearning to connect with people. When you find yourself in these situations, try these 3 simple steps to get out of your head and start making some meaningful connections.

1. Put your phone away! Even though you’re clutching to your phone because you’re not sure what to do with yourself until some talks to you, doing so actually communicates that you’re not interested in meeting people. Your security blanket is preventing you from in-person networking.

2. Approach someone else who is by herself and ask a basic question, like, “Have you been to these events before?” or “Do you work fill in the blank field?” Even though these questions have yes or no answers, they also lead to more conversation about the event or what the person does for a living. Keep asking questions and share a bit about yourself until the conversation flows smoothly.

3. Remember to get the person’s name and business card. If you start a conversation as I suggest above, you may reach the end of it without actually exchanging names. As you wrap up, reach your hand out for a shake, and casually introduce your name. It may sound backward but in the moment it works. Starting with, “What’s your name?” at these events feels weird and like a dead end. So, start with a more meaningful conversation and remember to do names afterward.

How do you handle events where you don’t know anyone and want to know everyone? Tell us in the comments below.