If you’re considering starting to negotiate for the first time—you should know—you may not win. It sounds obvious, right? But it recently hit me that people who are hesitant to negotiate want to be told that if they do x, y, and z, they will get what they’re asking for. There is no magic formula. Deciding to start negotiating doesn’t mean you will be a good negotiator your first time. But the only way to get better is to practice. 

If you’re new to negotiating—like anything you try for the first time—you’ll be rusty. And if you’re jumping in with experienced negotiators on the other side of the table—they have an advantage. That’s alright!

Losing a negotiation does not mean that you should not have negotiated. Or that your efforts were a waste of time. Or that you embarrassed yourself (I mean, unless you did ;)). Negotiating is an honorable and worthwhile thing to do—regardless of outcome. Learn some lessons and be more prepared the next time opportunity presents itself. And even as your game improves, you may still lose some—you may still be told that no, this is the highest salary your new employer can offer. That’s okay. You can’t win them all. But don’t avoid playing the game because you might lose. You really might! And that’s okay. Eventually you will win and it’ll all be worth it.