What trying to keep plants alive taught me about myself
Only 2 of these are still alive and that’s okay.
24. That’s how many plants we have in our 525 square foot studio apartment. Big ones and small ones. Some that hang from the ceiling and others that live on the floor. I’ve wanted to be a plant person for a while but every time I got a plant I killed it. I told myself I had a brown thumb. But then I got a plant in the summer of 2018 and I kept it alive! In fact, I’ve kept a bunch of plants alive for many months, some over a year!
Some plants thrive in our apartment. Others live out their retirement with us.
I’m developing (it’s an action verb) a green thumb. I’m learning about soil and fertilizer and sunlight. By learning I mean I am actively failing all the time—and sometimes I’m not failing. But it’s all okay and it’s all a process.
I tried propagating succulents. The jade is coming along nicely. Some of the others were like, ‘no thanks, k bye.’
What I hadn’t realized about all those times I had killed plants is that that failure is not an end (I mean it is for that plant, poor thing), but not for my ability to have plants. I can keep getting knew ones and trying new things and not getting too attached to them. If they go, they go. Cycle of life. If they live, I replicate what I did and life goes on. I had to tell myself the stakes were not that high in order to start moving on this project. I haven’t been aiming for perfect plants, I’ve been aiming to learn and enjoy the process. And I think I’m a little more patient for it.
What are the things you would try to do if you knew a) you were probably going fail along the way, and b) you’d eventually get better? What’s at stake when we avoid trying things we know we’re not very good at?