This post is about letting go of what you wanted and making the most of what you have.

We’ve all been there, you get to a new job thinking your boss will be all that you believe you need in a boss. You’re far enough in your career that you feel pretty confident about the kind of structure you need, the kind of relationship you’d like to have and the kind of supervision you require in order to produce your best. And then, surprise, surprise, your boss isn’t the person you thought she was.

In some cases, she may just be awful. I’m not telling you to love your awful boss. I’m telling you there may be some benefits to having the boss you have, not the boss you want. This is about your growth. 

Can you work under a different kind of person and still succeed? Can you step up or back in ways you didn’t think you could? What if your boss wants to do things a little differently than you’re used to? Or what if she doesn’t really care how you do them and you’re given freedoms you’ve never been granted before? If you stop for a minute to see how you’ve grown in that relationship, what do you find? Maybe she lacks in certain ways and you pick up the slack, impressing yourself with what you’re able to do. Maybe she’s more laid back and the control freak in you doesn’t know what to do. Can you experiment with emulating this kind of go-with-the-flow attitude? How does it impact your work? Your mood? 

Ultimately, you can’t control other people. Bosses are human and not always the humans we think they are. What’s important here is that you are being given the opportunity to adapt to change and to learn something about yourself. It’s really not about your boss. It’s about you and what you do when things get shaken up in your life.